Tag Archives: nanny

Everything Dies

On our way home from the carousel yesterday, with his 4-year-old brother asleep in the car seat next to him, the soon-to-be 3-year-old I nanny for began spontaneously – and very calmly – listing aloud all of the things and people that are subject to die.

He listed individuals, inanimate objects, and really anything he could think of. While I couldn’t quite make out most of what he was saying, I did hear: “And Finn (his brother) will die. And garbage cans will die.” His list went on for a while. And ____ will die. And ____will die…

He ended by saying: “Everything…in the…WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD…will die.”

I thought it rather impressive that he saw fit to not only state this in slow fashion but also put emphasis on the words that he did.

He then added the words: “right away” to the end of his declarative finale. As in: Everything in the whole entire world will die. (pause) Right away.

I queried back in response: “Everything will die right away?”

“Right away.” he repeated.

Sensing there was something lost in translation, I rephrased and asked, “Everything will die right now?”

“No.” he said, very matter of factly.

“Do you mean that everything will die some time?” I asked.

“Yes,” he agreed, everything will die some time, Cole.”

“That’s true.” I said.

And that was that.

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Posted by on February 2, 2018 in Everyday Practice


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A Teaching Moment

It was deceivingly chilly outside the other day, when we went for a walk. Still, I dressed them in a warm-enough outer layer and hats that covered their ears. Half-way down the block, though, the allure of a late-October stroll to the park amid a blue sky and sunny day was masked by whipping winds, which carried winter’s slow approach on its breath. Suddenly, the delight of traipsing through colorful and crispy leaf piles was replaced by great discomfort. Scrunched up faces of disapproval and whining quickly ensued.

“It’s cold, let’s go home!!” said the 4-year-old.

“Eeehaaaaaaoohhh,” said the 2-year-old – or something to that affect.

I did briefly consider their input. I even glanced in the direction of the warm house we could return to, before determining that what we had here before us was an opportunity. This was a teaching moment.

I made some minor adjustments before we proceeded, one of which was to redirect our destination. The others involved putting the 2-year-old in the empty stroller I had carted along and showing both boys how to tuck their frigid fingers up into the sleeves of their sweaters, like turtle heads retreating into their shell. Lastly, and most important, I shook off my own feelings of cold displeasure, buoyed my attitude, and re-calibrated my compass in the direction of adventure. For good measure, I reminded my fellow travel companions that we were heading to the place we intended on going after visiting the park, which would afford them the chance to pick out a treat in which to enjoy after lunch.

The two-year-old was appeased enough to stop his caterwauling, once he was nestled in the stroller. The four-year-old, however, was decidedly unconvinced that anything other than returning home was in his best interest. Since he really didn’t have any other viable options, though, he reluctantly trudged alongside of us. Through his continued pleas to turn back and complaints of how cold it was, I made out-loud observations about the Halloween decorations on display at the houses we passed by and the beauty of the day. It wasn’t that I was trying to dismiss him or tune him out, I just wasn’t adding fuel to his detrimental utterings by listening intently – which, I might add, also helps with not getting personally swept up in the falderal of children’s un-skilled (and fleeting) reactions. After all, young ones are constantly learning from the words and behaviors of the adults that surround them. So, if I were to become as eq!”ually dis-satisfied with the coldness as he was, it would be teaching him to stay in that mode, instead of learning how to transition out of it. It’s worth mentioning that regardless of what’s going on, the level of our happiness depends almost solely on our attitude. We are presented with an active choice in every moment in regards to how we respond to whatever it is that’s happening.

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Sometimes that happens!

I use the phrase “Sometimes that happens” often enough that when the play-doh factory broke, one of the little boys I nanny for, who was 3 at the time, turned to me and asked, “Does that happen sometimes?” I answered in the affirmative and we went back to playing.

Side note: I’m thinking this might make for a great children’s book. I’d call it Sometimes That Happens, team up with a local artist, and include a variety of kid-related topics all ending with the catch phrase: Sometimes that happens!

Here are a couple of things I’ve experienced over the past week that happen sometimes:

– Your stint as Movie Captain with the online platform Gathr becomes more than you bargained for when you’re forced to field a wealth of confusion after they email your ticket holders about a change in venue to a theater located 2,500 miles away. Sometimes that happens!

– After finally deciding that no, you will not drive 4-hours south directly following a 4-day camping trip with friends in hopes of seeing the full solar eclipse and you’re perfectly happy to see the 90% visible from Missoula, you change your mind after listening to a NASA historian give a talk about the eclipse at your local library, where he offers the analogy that the difference between seeing a partial vs. a total solar eclipse is the difference between reading about chocolate and eating it. Sometimes that happens!

I find this phrase incredibly helpful and use it often throughout the day. It helps me to not get bogged down in my set expectations, plans, or attachments to how I think things “should” be. And it’s a work in progress, of course, too. Some things are easier to transition along with than others.

As I often say: The practice continues!

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Posted by on August 4, 2017 in Everyday Practice


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